Posts tagged ‘Hey people lets stop killing innocent people for a little while’

CPAC Proves To Be Object Of Alternate Universe: Ron Paul To Rule Alternate Universe With Iron Fist

By shortsshortsshorts, 21 February, 2010, 5 Comments

Oh.. Ron Paul. Two parts to a name that when joined together create a feeling of bliss and hope, like a choir of angels ejaculated into a cerebral cortex. It is right to still respect the man enough to say; “Yah! Down with the IRS, and HABEAS CORPUS FOR ALL FOREVER AND ALSO FOREVER ALSO maybe.”

We contest why Ron Paul is a favorite when it comes to this little ‘ere website. An enigma brought by scores of people wrapped in their own grip of destitution continues to breathe down the throats of the innocent shouldn’t be brought into the open flame to rape the minds of the other followers of Xenu. We must ask— how did this repugnant trolley-fucker bring himself so far out of the musk and dominate a fairly sizable portion of our population?

That is the point of today’s wonderful post. A subject you have probably already read. Ron Paul. Revolution 2012.

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GOSSIP AND GUNS— Two American Traditions

By shortsshortsshorts, 25 November, 2009, 4 Comments

Yes, we may TYPICALLY be into politics at this ‘ere place, BUT LOOK AT THAT AK-47! Don’t you just want to pick it up and start an insurgency? OH MAN, we love guns and war. WAR, all the time. Remember all the posts we have about war and guns? WAR! ALL THE TIME! WAAARRRRRRR!!!!!

So anyway, there has been lots of DISCUSSION (gossip, if you will), that the AK-47 hasn’t been faithful to mother Russia. Mikhail Kalashnikov, the gun’s creator, didn’t make a dime off the thing. We find this to be an injustice, as thousands of other war profiteers have been relying on the AK-47 in a monetary sense for decades. Today we stand in praise of Mikhail Kalashnikov, who inspired murder and genocide for millions of people.

Pay homage to his contributions to death life.

The Club For Growth (Not the Erectile Disfunction Kind)

By shortsshortsshorts, 17 November, 2009, 9 Comments

The miraculous movement started in 1999 to destroy the Republican Party, somehow, has gained quite a bit of tread in the last year. This is an unexplainable anomaly, as The Club For Growth believes essentially the same thing as the GOP. The difference? THEY ARE THE NEW, IMPROVED GOP. Just look at what they did for Doug Hoffman! He was actually the “front-runner” of the right in New York’s 23rd Congressional District election, all because of The Club For Growth.

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One Way to Get the Hell Out of Afghanistan

By God, 17 November, 2009, 4 Comments

Chascates— ShortsandPants’ worst enemy (HE HATES THIS WEBSITE SO VERY MUCH)— submits a solution that will make most Conservatives immediately diabetic. Seizures all round. It may involve “logic,” which is far too much for many of us to bear — but let’s give it a shot.

“Since we can’t kill all the Muslims and the generals in charge suggest working with them a free market approach might be in order. The average Afghan makes about $700 per year. The average G.I. costs us $1 million a year (support, overhead, paybacks to contractors, etc.)

Our intelligence estimates 100 al Qaeda left in Afghanistan/Pakistan. They’re pretty much bottled up in caves. There are about 25,000 Taliban, but many of these are merely opportunistic tribesmen (Hell, they are ALL tribes of one sort or another rather than peoples with a national identity) who would change sides if paid. Our ’surge’ in Iraq was helped mainly by the ‘Sunni Awakening’ which was brought about by paying former militants to lay down their arms.

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