Posts tagged ‘god will destroy the USA’

Pregnant G.I.s To Be Imprisoned/Lashed

By shortsshortsshorts, 21 December, 2009, 1 Comment

Up until this year, pregnancy was considered to be a normal part of a woman’s life. Baby-making used to be encouraged, and the joys of parenthood felt by many middle to upper class Americans.

However, there is a RIFT. It appears that if you’re a GI serving under General Cucolo in Northern Iraq, you best not have any buns in the oven. If you do, you will be court marshaled and sent to a gulag.

Under General Cucolo’s order, troops also are prohibited from “sexual contact of any kind” with Iraqi nationals. And they cannot spend the night with a member of the opposite sex, unless married or expressly permitted to do so.

So keep those lady-bits away from those male-bits — if you know what’s good for you — army folk.

The Worst World Net Daily Thing We Have Ever Seen

By shortsshortsshorts, 10 December, 2009, 4 Comments

Here’s something that should make the heathen-blood boil! His name is Kenneth L. Hutcherson, and he wrote a thing that is just RANDY, we tell you. World Net Daily has never made such an honest and straight-forward point.

Another way secular society is trying to control Christians is by the fallacy of the separation of church and state. That establishment clause was intended to protect the church from the state, not to keep the church from participating in the state. Christians’ ignorance of the meaning of the establishment clause has allowed us to be controlled just like the African Americans were in the 1950s and ’60s.

READ THE BLOCK QUOTE AGAIN. Read it 80 times. Christians are not just the new black, they are SUPPOSED to be intermingled with State affairs, all the time. The roughly 60 words you see above are spot on. No questions, please.

“Scientists are on the verge of cloning humans, injecting them with diseases and studying them, then killing them.”

By shortsshortsshorts, 6 October, 2009, 1 Comment

When did science start this deplorable practice?

The woman who said this was Cathie Adams — the enraged wing nut from Texas. She was speaking of the evils of a plan backed by Governor Perry and even President Bush that would give $30 million to fund cancer research. But, as Cathie shares with us, cancer research is inherently evil. What else say you, Cathie?

“While many question Barak Hussein Obama’s ‘religion’…, the more important question is whether he has a ‘relationship’ with Jesus Christ because that is the only HOPE that any of us have to obtain eternal life. I personally see NO evidence that Obama has that kind of ‘saving faith.’”

God On the Field

By shortsshortsshorts, 1 October, 2009, 2 Comments

The finely screwed up balance between church and state is something that continues to plague Small Town America. It is the hottest issue since coat-hanger abortions became legalized in 1994 and marijuana prescriptions began for 5 year-old children in 1998. Now there is a different beast ruining our society — religious signs and chants during a high school football game.

Now, your ShortsandPants has talked about this sort of thing before. It is almost an anomaly at this point — BUT when the bullshit is thrown, it is our job to catch it. Here comes the funcooker!

The Passion of Rick Perry’s Webcast

By shortsshortsshorts, 30 September, 2009, 2 Comments

It’s time for Bible Study at ShortsandPants!

T’was the first day after the eve of the eve of the first day. The Perry sat with his disciples around the table in what was to be a great feast. However, solemnity came quickly. The Perry said quietly, “I tell you the truth, one of you here will betray me.” The disciples looked at each other dumbfounded, and some of them asked the Perry, “It isn’t me, is it Lord?”

And ye, it would be made so.

“The one who understands the Domain Name Server will betray me. I will die, just as it is written, but the man who betrays me will feel sorry forever.” And it was thus that his disciples assembled their strategy. Who, among them, would betray the Perry?

Prepare for Hell

By shortsshortsshorts, 22 September, 2009, 8 Comments

Do not trust anyone with a bible in their hand posing for a photo. It is essential that you heed these words. When you have people like Bill Keller in the world, this point is only made more concretely.

To jest, the man’s radio show has become something of a “Holier Then Thou” freak show. Not to say it wasn’t before— it was. But now the man has gone over the edge. He may actually believe what he’s saying. Is it possible?

Your Daily Malkin

By pantspantspants, 4 May, 2009, 10 Comments

There are some great stories on Shelley Malkin’s website today, but I’m not writing about any of them. This is because I’m going to take the time today to concentrate on a man whose views, when placed next to Shelley’s, seem downright moderate.

This is the story of a man who cares about America; a patriot who will fight like hell to support his country; a true American who will save the Republican party and will lead them back to a majority in 2010.

Who is this man, this moderate, this savior of the Republican Party? Is it Bobby Jindall? No. Is it Jeb Bush? Not on your life. How about Michael Steele? Dream on. This new leader—the face of true “compassionate conservatism” in 2010 and beyond—is none other than Neal Horsley. Let’s explore the website of a true winning candidate whose views represent inalienable truths.