Hello, dear readers. This is your Editor speaking to you from the depths of a thing somewhere near the Pacific Ocean. Your ShortsandPants took a break for a few days, and is now saying “hello” again. We are returning to you unfettered. Stop calling/e-mailing your Editor with stories about withdrawal from this website, and Happy Tuesday.




Yeah just get back to work already.
We can call you? Oh man, you’re really not gonna want to publish your phone number. I can call the real ‘merika for free from anywhere in the world and that’s gonna be a minimum of 8 time zones away.