Here’s in God’s America we have our very own 9/11 whore, Rudy 911iani. For years the dress-wearing lunatic waltzed around America, shouting 9/11 at whatever and whoever, trading on the fact that he managed not to look like a jackass on that fateful day.

Then he ran for president, fell flat on his face and everyone laughed at him. The end.

As Rudy martyred America on the cross of terror, UK Prime Minister Tony Blair was matching him lie for lie, though perhaps with a bit more sang froid (our editor has never managed to make italics work on this site.)

Like Dick Cheney and his whiny daughter, Blair continued to explicitly and implicitly intertwine Saddam Hussein and the 9/11 terrorists, as if that whole dumbass canard hadn’t been disproved years ago.

Now out of office and bleeding cash from his eyeballs thanks to the lecture circuit, Blair today crossed his Waterloo, or met his Rubicon, or something, testifying today at the Chilcott inquiry into the UK’s role in the buildup to the Iraq invasion.

Showing a decided lack of geographical knowledge, Blair brazenly proclaimed “I never regarded September 11 as an attack on America, I regarded it as an attack on us.”

Never one to deny himself the poodle’s privileges that come with being America’s lapdog, Blair spewed the same ol’ crap about Saddam and nuclear weapons and Saddam and chemical weapons and Saddam and his dirty diaper that neocon comb-lickers like Paul Wolfowitz used to cudgel Congress into giving W carte blanche to bomb the fuck out of Iraq.

Fortunately the British inquiry was open to the public, unlike the closed American commission set up to whitewash the extraordinarily boneheaded mistakes by the US intelligence community that allowed 9/11 to happen. So Blair got his fair share of heckling as he dissembled for six hours today, with shouts of “you’re a liar…and a murderer” raining down from the peanut gallery.

He may be a smiling, two-faced, lying butt-licker, but any man who can shovel the bullshit for six hours deserves our respect and admiration. Dick Cheney would die of a heart attack if he had to keep track of his lies for six hours in front of Congress.

Blair claims he has no regrets, and nearly broke his arm patting himself on the back for ridding the world of Saddam. Except it was mostly American troops who rid the world of Saddam, with Me-too Tony’s UK troops there mostly to show his constituents how tough he is.

Righteous he may still be, but Blair’s “reputation and credibility at home crumbled,” and he was eventually set aside in favor of his former BFF, Gordon Brown. However, like Bush and the Republicans, Blair so tarnished his Labor Party’s reputation (along with that little economic crisis thingy) that Brown and Labor will be tossed out of office at the next election.

The lesson learned is that being a bloodthirsty wannabe tyrant, or a bloodthirsty yes-man poodle, who lies repeatedly, fashions “intelligence” out of whole cloth and then justifies it all by blaming someone who had nothing to do with the original sin, will get you tossed out of office (eventually,) humiliated in the court of public opinion and then obscenely, disgustingly wealthy as you repeat the same crap for gullible right-wing cretins who will go to their death beds denying you ever did anything wrong.

Ain’t democracy great?

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