Is there nothing more beautiful than war? Does it make you want to sing and dance, to croon “Oh what a beautiful morning…” in the shower? Do you love the smell of napalm in the morning? If you answered no, yes and yes then have I got a boyfriend for you — Rudy Giuliani!
Rough Rudy loves war more than chocolate chip cookies and Jesus juice combined. In fact, if Rudy G. could be at war 24/7, 365 days a week for the rest of his life he’d put a diaper on so he wouldn’t have to stop to pee. That’s how much he loves war.
Of course when Attorney General Eric Holder announced that he was bringing some evil terrorists to trial in New York City, Rudy had a sad. He hates the Constitution so much that he said our justice system is geared to let guilty people go free. And as a former US District Attorney for Manhattan, Rudy knows all about letting guilty people go free. One of his best friends is a free guilty person. Unfortunately for Rudy, Bernie Kerik is about to be an unfree guilty person, having finally been convicted in a court of law. That was the one time our justice system totally fucked up and didn’t let a guilty person go free.
Where were we? Oh yeah — war. Despite Rudy G. being all frowny-faced about AG Holder giving evil terrorists a criminal trial, instead of lopping off their heads and displaying them on pikes outside the gates to the city, one thing Holder said made Rudy’s heart sing:
“I was glad to see Holder say ‘we’re at war,’” Giuliani said on the RNC-sponsored call. “I had thought we had virtually stopped being at war with the terrorists.”
Giuliani said he hoped the use of the word would hearken back to a return to the Bush era “War On Terror” which Giuliani said President Obama has abandoned, both in rhetoric and actions. “I was under the impression that the Obama administration thought this was just an unfortunate situation we’re dealing with.”
“‘War’ is important,” he said.
Yes. War is important. It’s especially important to self-important blowhards who traffic in fear and hate and demagoguery. The kind of clowns who feed on the insecurity of the people they failed when the people needed them most. People like Rudy Giuliani will cry for war and talk about war and never stop telling us how vitally important war is because he doesn’t want us to ever stop and think…how did we get in this situation in the first place?
And now I see the Internets rumor mill is saying Giuliani will run for senate and then if elected consider a 2016 presidential bid. He’s getting more conservative by the minute to make that happen. Interesting that his comments this week on KSM trial in NYC are exactly opposite to what he said a few years ago on Moussai’s trial, in which he trumpeted the strength of the US criminal justice system. Now he seems to think it inadequate. BE VERY AFRAID! OUR INSTITUTIONS CAN’T PROTECT YOU! I hope his ride on the teabagger express leaves sweaty, spent, and alone.
A note on Rudy’s personal warring via Wiki:
Giuliani did not serve in the military during the Vietnam War. He received a student deferment while at Manhattan College and another while at NYU Law. Upon graduation from NYU Law in 1968, he was classified as 1-A, available for military service. He applied for a deferment but was rejected. In 1969, MacMahon [Giuliani clerked for Judge Lloyd MacMahon] wrote a letter to Giuliani’s draft board, asking that he be reclassified as 2-A, civilian occupation deferment, because Giuliani, who was a law clerk for MacMahon, was an essential employee. The deferment was granted. In 1970, Giuliani received a high draft lottery number; he was not called up for service although by then he had been reclassified 1-A.
Rudy will never get elected to the Senate so the run for president ain’t gonna happen.
I guess he wasn’t sufficiently humbled buy his strong showing in the last GOP primary. One vote is better than none.
[...] BUT LOOK AT THAT AK-47! Don’t you just want to pick it up and start an insurgency? OH MAN, we love guns and war. WAR, all the time. Remember all the posts we have about war and guns? WAR! ALL THE [...]