Did you know that God hates health care? Did you know that Jesus does too? Did you also know that we, as human beings, are apparently incapable of rational thought?

Just look at these people! They are a real hoot!

“Some may ask what does God have to do with our health care system,” wrote Minnesota Family Council president Tom Prichard. “For one, He’s created the government as an institution in society to do certain things. When we reject His design for government, in a sense, we’re rejecting Him.”

Alright, people— we must take this message literally, just as the bible is to be taken as literally as possible. This may sound a little harsh, but because God created Government, and the Government called for slavery— we have to bring back slavery.

It’s kind of a win-win for people like the person quoted above. After all, it DOES get that “uppity black man” out of the White House, right?

So who else is talking about this God in governance thing?

The Christian Coalition of America is pitting seniors against immigrants. Health care reform would “provide healthcare to illegal aliens, while rationing care to elderly and disabled American citizens.”

WE GOTTA KILL GRANDMA TO SAVE DIM MESSICANS? Oh man that is just TERRIBLE! What is wrong with us? It is much more humane for grandma to be fucked over with bad pharmaceutical practices and greedy insurance bastards who want nothing more than for grandma to die, as would be good for the bottom line.

Anyway, Jesus loves the private sector— and slavery.

The end.

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